Sunday, November 30, 2008


I know it's a little late for a Thanksgiving-esque post, but a recent comment on my Facebook account kind of made me think about it.

About a year ago, I struggled with depression, heck, I still do to a degree. I had gotten so low that I had a pair of scissors to my arm and a voice in my head saying, "Cut yourself, you'll feel numb, you won't feel anything anymore." Fortunately, this scared me very much because that voice wasn't my own. I called my mom, my therapist, and two close friends-- one of which came to my dorm immediately and prayed with me. (Bless her soul!) Because of this, and past bouts with depression, I am truly thankful for my very life. If God hadn't stepped in at that critical hour, I honestly don't know if I'd be sitting here writing this today.

Because of these past experiences, I had to make some changes in my life, particularly the people in my life. It was a very painful thing to do, but I feel it was necessary. I'm a lot better now. I did get into a touch of a backwards-slide when I went abroad (drinking, smoking-->which I quit..), but now I'm continuing some of the changes and am continuing on my road to living a life that is pleasing to the Lord.

My church has been a huge influence on my life. It's been my rock during this past year when I've been going through all sorts of crap. Last week's sermon about Soft Hearts ( podcast/mp3 here )really hit me. I've hardened my heart to the world that's hurt me, pushing everyone away...even my God. I'm slowly on the way back to Him and trying to find some new, solid relationships in my life, as it seems that I'm not the only one that's made changes. But that's not the point I was trying to make... My church gave us the opportunity to share what we're thankful for on a video to be shown this Sunday (which I was unfortunately unable to see!) and I was in it. A dear friend said in response to my status of being pathetic (an entirely different blog!): "but you looked great on the [church] video today, if that helps..." And it really did. It reminded me of what being thankful is all about.

Also, my friend has cancer. She's doing better, but her struggles really makes me realize how thankful I really am for my life.

Now I leave you with my favorite song, "I'm on my way" by Rich Price.
Here it is, on the right- side of the page if you want to listen to it, which you do.

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